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OLD MAN TELLS FUNNIEST JOKE EVER!

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Old man tells joke about irs and gambleling. Like and subscribe
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Text Comments (8281)
Aidan Robinson (52 minutes ago)
Why are black people scared of chainsaws Because they go run nigga nigga
jen Jen (11 hours ago)
Nice one
Brandon H. (15 hours ago)
So...a Grasshopper walks into a bar..sits down at the bar and orders his drink. The bartender says “holy shit..we have a drink named after you”...and the Grasshopper says “really? You have a drink named Fred”.
Fewerprouder 1775 (16 hours ago)
I read that in my grandfathers book. But it was in a bar 😂 I love that joke
BIG RON (18 hours ago)
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. (suicide for those who are slow)
Braden Woolley (20 hours ago)
Omg! I live that!
Les P (23 hours ago)
I’ve heard this joke before
toe toe (1 day ago)
The egg is laughing at a joke and he said to the other egg that joke was hilarious you’ve cracked me up
Youtuber Trump (1 day ago)
What do you give a Trump that gets an abortion?? A reward from crime stoppers!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂
Advanced Aimbot11 (1 day ago)
This was so funny I forgot to laugh
Dresden Brown (1 day ago)
HAHAHAHAHA... it's so funny I forgot to laugh... Jk it was actually pretty funny
CohenB (2 days ago)
Put him in letterkenny
Arye.k (2 days ago)
What's the difference between a Mexican dad and a pizza? One can feed the family
Dynasty Love (2 days ago)
Joke was not funny
Mathias Kolding (3 days ago)
How has no one made the connection that this is just like that Tarantino joke in Desperado!?!?
Bryan Jimenez (4 days ago)
All I hear is Alabama
Kameleonic (4 days ago)
Took a bit long to get there, but it's worth it:))
izzy B (4 days ago)
Why did cavemen drag their women by the hair? Because if they dragged them by their legs they would fill up with sand
Meeean Azz (4 days ago)
A man says to his best friend, I have two love's in my life but I must get rid of one. One is my dear wife Martha and one is my best pal Duke my dog. I just don't know what to do! I love them both! I mean how is a man meant to choose? Do you have any suggestions?? The best friend says.. Put them both in the boot of the car. Take em for a burn around the block. When you get home open the boot and see which one is happy to see you 😬
peter mcnamara (4 days ago)
i’ve heard funnier
A Dead Man (4 days ago)
😂😂😂 that's fucked
alex huber (4 days ago)
Why isint Hellen Keller a very good driver??? Not because she is blind and deaf. Its because shes a Woman.
lil Bleach (5 days ago)
That's a good joke
lulabell 79 (5 days ago)
What do you call a dead blonde under the porch? Last year's hide and seek winner!
lulabell 79 (5 days ago)
A little boy goes up to his father and asks: “Dad, what’s the difference between hypothetical and realistic?” The father replies, “Well son, I could give you the book definitions, but I feel it could be best to show you by example. Go upstairs and ask your mother if she’d have sex with the mailman for $500,000.” The boy goes and asks his mother: “Mom, would you have sex with the mailman for $500,000?” The mother replies, “Hell yes I would!” The little boy returns to his father. “Dad, she said ‘Hell yes I would!’” The father then says, “OK, now go and ask your older sister if she’d have sex with her principal for $500,000.” The boy asks his sister, “Would you have sex with your principal for $500,000?” The sister replies: “Hell yes I would!” He returns to his father. “Dad, she said ‘Hell yes I would!’” The father tells his boy, “OK, son, here’s the deal: Hypothetically, we’re millionaires, but realistically, we’re living with a couple of whores.”
lulabell 79 (5 days ago)
A guy is driving around the back woods of Montana and he sees a sign in front of a broken down shanty-style house: 'Talking Dog For Sale.' He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a nice looking Labrador Retriever sitting there. "You talk?" he asks. "Yep" the Lab replies. After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says, "So, what's your story?" The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping, I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running... but the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired." The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. "Ten dollars" the owner says. The guy says "Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on Earth are you selling him so cheap?" The owner said "Because he's a liar. He didn't do any of that shit!"
The lowest of YouTube (5 days ago)
I hope this guy has a great life
WoodrowWilson (5 days ago)
One day a woman passes by a pet shop on her walk home. In the window were 3 parrots. One was $2,000, one $1,500, and the last $200. She, being intrigued, walked in and inquired as to why the one was so cheap, but was the only one that actually talked. The manager says “well, it’s got a pretty foul mouth.” The woman, having previously owned a couple parrots, decides to strike up a deal. She says to the manager “listen, give me the parrot for the weekend, and I’ll bring it back Monday with a polite attitude. If I’m successful, I’ll take it for $100.” Manager says “deal.” Monday rolls around and the woman returns as agreed with the parrot and exclaims “I’VE DONE IT!!” The manager was obviously in disbelief and noticed 2 strings tied to the parrot’s feet. So he asks “How did you do it?” The woman says “see those strings on his feet? Pull the left one gently.” So manager pulls the string and the parrots says “Good day, sir!” The manager was SHOCKED. The woman says “now pull on the right one.” Manager obliges, parrot says “You have beautiful eyes.” Now the manager is just beaming, he asks the woman, “ok. So what happens if I pull both strings then?” The parrot replies “I’d fall on my fucking ass, you schmuck.”
Zigod Gaming (3 days ago)
....
bobwayne911 (5 days ago)
Lololololololololol - thanks
Michael Brians (5 days ago)
This joke is from the movie Desperado
Adrian Rojas (5 days ago)
Whats he difference between a knife and a feminist? A knife has a point
ɥǝʎɥoʍpʎɥǝʎ (5 days ago)
The funniest joke ever is soccer
Joel Doherty (5 days ago)
What's the smartest thing to come out of a woman's mouth...? Einstein's cock.
Darren Johnson (5 days ago)
Stole my damn joke man
The Last Pilot (5 days ago)
Not that funny and rather old.
Rex Hargrove (6 days ago)
Priceless
Romaion (6 days ago)
What do you call bees that make milk? Boobies.
Graden Sorensen (6 days ago)
Why was the little boy sad? It’s because there was a frog stapled to his face
nolan linton 07 (6 days ago)
Good joke
Terrance Bryant (6 days ago)
Lol kinda good
Dom Mirra (6 days ago)
Old man?????? Lmao
Amazing Abdul Muizz (7 days ago)
I can't understand what he's saying
Zigod Gaming (3 days ago)
😂😂😂😂 k
comer pickles (7 days ago)
Cuba is holding up a swimming marathon. The conductor is announcing that the following nation competitors-Puerto Rico, Cuba, and America-will be challenged to do the farthest swimming distance. so Puerto rico goes first: *Okay, Puerto swimming 10 feet, 20, 30, and he's given up, and is coming back.* *Now USA he's going 10, 20, 30, 40, and he's given up and is coming back* *Last but not least, Cuba! Lets see if he's got something. He's going 10 feet, 20, 30, 40, 50, 60, 70...........Wait.....HURRY, GET HIM! HE'S TRYING TO ESCAPE TO THE UNITED STATES!!!!*
Sean Hatch (7 days ago)
Almost as funny as the herpes on that lip boy!
Otto von Bismarck (7 days ago)
That was very ha ha
Ni Willis (7 days ago)
Brilliant.
sjackjrman (7 days ago)
Saturday night this baby seal walked into this club and..........
anthony watts (7 days ago)
That piss joke is from the movie desperado
Anonymous Sources (7 days ago)
Let us know when we can hear the funniest joke ever
Max Harter (7 days ago)
No one's been able to tell it. They all keep dying for some reason.
Carnage Thunder (7 days ago)
Epic. I'll subscribe
Enter Resting Apes (7 days ago)
This is an old joke, quentin tarantino tole it in the movie Desperado changing the IRS desk with a bar.
Arthur Morgan (7 days ago)
Damn I was laughing my ass off
General Bacon (7 days ago)
😂
Livin Large (7 days ago)
This is a variation of a bar joke from the movie Desperado...still good tho
UGLY Palpatine (7 days ago)
How does he remember this whole joke
WoodrowWilson (5 days ago)
UGLY Palpatine He watched Desperado a few times. It’s in that movie just told a little differently.
UGLY Palpatine (7 days ago)
More like worlds longest joke
Johnny Molloy (7 days ago)
this made my day
BOOM4LIFE (7 days ago)
the joke with the piss on the face loving it came out of a move called Desperado , with that guy Antonio' Banderas and fine ass chick Salma
Mike Buffo (7 days ago)
Guy driving his truck sees a Priest walking. He pulls over and offers a lift Sees a Lawyer walking along and, as was his habit, pulled over to run over him. At the last second, he thought, "I can't do this with a Priest watching," so pulled back on the road. He said, "I'm sorry, Father, but I'm in the habit of running over lawyers when I see them but I couldn't with you in the truck with me." The Priest replied, "That's all right, My Son. I opened the door and got him as we passed."
Flick Dasher (7 days ago)
young couple go back to the girl's parents house after a night out and start getting down to business on the settee.after a while,the lad says "i need the toilet,where is it?"she says "you can't go upstairs,you'll wake my mum and dad.use the kitchen sink".so,off he goes.five minutes later he pops his head round the door and says "have you any paper?"
Vera (7 days ago)
Lmao
D-D-D Diggy (7 days ago)
Funny? Begone male thot
soulfreaz (7 days ago)
I was wondering why the frisbee was getting bigger, and then it hit me.
yea (7 days ago)
cool
Brian Miller (7 days ago)
Didn’t even watch the vid yet but we should rename the video to fat redneck tells retarded joke he heard from his cousin Bucky
J Mc (7 days ago)
That joke is similar to one told on pulp fiction
matman33 (8 days ago)
He’s so cute and friendly I love his accent
Jona (8 days ago)
Yo gravity falls
Arin Dawood (8 days ago)
This joke was rewritten but originally stolen from a a movie called Desperado written by Quentin Tarantino
Paul Thompson (8 days ago)
some desperado shit
PrankEpic (8 days ago)
A man was driving with his blonde wife and out of curiosity asked her to check if the turn signals were working; she sticks her head out the window and replies "yes...no...yes...no".
kashis08 (8 days ago)
It’s like the desperado joke
LewdGaming (8 days ago)
Nice gaming video.
Fahim Alef (8 days ago)
Why does dr pepper come in a bottle? Because his wife died a year ago
Johnny Shepard (8 days ago)
A guy walks into a bar with a monkey and immediately the monkey jumps onto the pool table and eats the eight ball. The bartender yells at the man to get his damn monkey and the man apologizes and pays for the eight ball, buys a drink and leaves. Two days later, the man and the monkey return. This time the monkey jumps on the bar grabs a cherry and goes to eat it. All of a sudden he stops and shoves the cherry up his ass, then he eats it. The bartender is like dude what the hell? Why did he stick the cherry in his ass? The man responded oh he learned his lesson after eating that damn eight ball. Size Test.
Zues 52 (8 days ago)
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Matt laz (8 days ago)
I think I laughed more with the way he says lawyer than the actual joke
Shant Joukjian (8 days ago)
This joke is in the movie Desperado. Not unique
Taffyacer (8 days ago)
His double chin is funnier
First Name Last Name (8 days ago)
Came for the video. Stayed and extra 45 minutes for the comments
Kortney Tackett (8 days ago)
Love it smart man
CANALI Rodriguez (8 days ago)
I got a joke for you, what do you call a man with one eye and one leg? IHOP....lol
CANALI Rodriguez (8 days ago)
Can I wash my winky in your kitchen sinky....?
FireFox (8 days ago)
he doesn’t look that old
Matt Fela (8 days ago)
Love it ! Awesome joke
Justin Dobyns (8 days ago)
Three men were walking along in the forest when they were captured by a group of cannibals. The king of the cannibals gives the three men a challenge "If you complete this challenge, you will go free, if not we will eat you." The three men, not wanting to die, agree to hear the challenge. "You most go in to the forest and pick out 10 of any fruit you find, bring those fruits back here" the king says. The three men head out in search of their fruit. The first man comes back with 10 apples in his hands, happy as can be. The king then says "You must shove those 10 apples up your butt without making a sound." The man reluctantly agrees to try. He gets the first one up without a sound, but screams in agony on the second and is killed and eaten. The second man comes back with 10 grapes in his hand. Again the king states the challenge. The 10 fruit up the ass, without any sound. This is going to be easy he thinks. He gets through the first 9 without a single sound. Just as he is about to shove the 10th grape up he bursts out in laughter. He is killed immediately. The second guy still laughing meets the first guy up in heaven. The first guy says, "What's so funny? You could have still been alive!" He replies "I saw our buddy coming back with 10 pineapples and a huge smile."
Adam Samir (8 days ago)
I’m British so his accent makes this joke 1000000x better😂😂
Joshua Kabbalah (8 days ago)
What do you call an IRS agent with 3 wives? Read more
timber_beast (8 days ago)
the only hope for humanity is right here.
Memories Per Gallon (8 days ago)
Wow congrats on the veiws 😁
Visionary Beats (8 days ago)
I heard this one but it was about a guy in a bar.
luc lachapelle (8 days ago)
What’s the difference between a lobster with breast implants and a dirty bus stop? One is a busty crustacean, and the other is a crusty bus-station
Anthony Dickinson (8 days ago)
😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆😆👍👍👍
Serendipitous Illicit (9 days ago)
This joke cracked me up today: So I saw a monkey in my back yard, and it was holding a bottle opener. I said to the monkey,''Why are you holding that?- you don't need it for opening a banana'' Then the monkey said,'' Its for a beer fuckhead''
insAneTunA (9 days ago)
What kinda language is he speaking? I don't understand a single word. I am sure that it isn't English because I can understand that very well.
Donovan Meyer (9 days ago)
So four gay guys walk into a bar, There is only one seat available So they flip it over....and take a seat
Rob Richardson (9 days ago)
https://youtu.be/moAZ3AsyhLU Link to Desperado joke
Rob Richardson (9 days ago)
I believe you stole that joke from the movie Desperado. Quentin Tarantino’s character told that joke at the bar.
Joseph Jakaj (9 days ago)
One day this catholic priest bumps into a leader of a mosk on the street, the Muslim leader curses at the priest “watch where you’re going you fucking moron!” The priest quite upset notices’ the leaders clothing and asks if hes religious, The Muslim leader nods yes and the two have a conversation and actually become friends and the catholic priest is invited over for dinner, not knowing the man is a catholic priest the leader of the mosk gives a rough explanation of the way of Muslim life, after hearing this the priest says listen, I think you’re a great guy but I still feel greatly disrespected by you since you cursed me when we bumped into each other, the mosk leader says forgive me forgive me! What can I do to gain your forgiveness? The catholic priest after hearing how Muslims live says well can you drink alcohol with me? The Muslim says no. The priest then asks well can you have some of this fine ham I brought along? The Muslim says no we are forbidden to eat pork, then the priest says well can you have sex with your sister? The Muslim says absolutely not! The priest says well you have to pick one to gain my forgiveness, deeply troubled by what he said to the priest the Muslim says fine! I’ll have some alcohol to ease your heart, after drinking the alcohol he got so messed up he ate the pork and porked his sister later that night 😂😂😂😂
James Cipriano (9 days ago)
Lmao!!😂😂😂😂

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